as a parent, becoming a parent again with child number two, i think my first fear/worry is 'how is child number one going to react to child number two entering our world??? i fear that oliver's little feelers will be hurt when the attention isn't on him 24/7 anymore. i fear that he will act out irrationally in public, to show me & a million strangers that he's not getting the attention he needs. i fear that it'll lead to all sorts of issues when he's entering into his adolescence & adulthood. okay...so maybe i don't fear that far...but it happens!!! i mean, he can hardly stand that i'm giving the laptop more attention than him right now just trying to tell this story...oh man! more fear!
often, i have people ask me "oh is oliver excited for the new baby?" and i don't get it...he's two...he barely knows the difference between his pants & a spoon. how is he supposed to interpret his emotions for a new baby? i can barely do that =) oliver engages in "baby" talk as much as he can, but it's hard to tell if he's excited or understands what is about to happen. how do i know?! how does anyone know?! he says "baby" when i ask 'who's in there?'...but i can't really determine what's going on inside that expanding 2 year old brain of his. because he also points to my belly button & says "brokey" which translates to broken...& i have to agree with him...my belly button is by far the furthest protrusion of my body & that just isn't right! it looks brokey for sure!
i also anticipate the feeling i'm going to personally have when there's another little being to love with all of my heart. i thought that it couldn't ache anymore with love for the tiny human you created, but it's going to. i may explode! and then WHO'S going to teach them how to create the most perfect plate of nachos ever in the world & build the best pillow fort in the living room to watch movies until way late hours on the weekends?
the fears aside, i know that all i can do is love each of my boys with every last piece of me & trust that everything will turn out just fine. and that's just what i'm going to do.
No comments:
Post a Comment